cycles of creativity

hello, friends. earlier this month i shared an essay on my own relationship with creativity over the years, as a way of offering you some insights into my own understanding of this wild, magical, strange and also deeply mundane aspect of humanity.

creativity can mean so many things, can intersect with spirituality and magic and wonder in so many ways. creativity itself is a living breathing thing, prone to change and shifts and transformation. so today, in the final breaths of 2024, i want to explore this aspect of creativity more deeply: creative cycles, and the ways that our own creativity can operate on its own timeline.

if you're interested in building (or rebuilding) a relationship with your own creativity, if you're craving creative community and support to keep you going, if you're eager to have something consistent to sink your teeth into next year amidst the horrors, please know that you're very welcome in the grove: six months of collective creative devotion. jeanna and i would love to have you, and early bird pricing (which includes our most generous payment plan) ends tomorrow at midnight ET:

what does your creativity look like when it's at its peak? when your creative energy is at an all time high, when inspiration is flowing in a way that feels effortless, when it seems like you can't get the words / colors / notes / ingredients / insert your medium of choice here out quickly enough — how does that feel in your body, in your heart, in your spirit?

and what does your creativity look like when it's lingering in the depths? when your inspiration or energy is at an all time low, when ideas or clarity or motivation feel completely out of reach? how does that feel in your mind, in your soul, in your darkest corners and most hidden places? how do you trust in your own creative timing, allow things to slow down rather than pushing at all costs?

you don't have to be a creative professional, or even consider yourself a creative person at all to have a relationship with creativity — we all have one. brainstorming is creative, innovation is creative, trying new things is creative. everyone has access to creativity — but for most people it's not a steady, constant flow of inspiration; a well that we can visit whenever we run dry.

creativity, like so many other aspects of being alive in this beautiful, broken world, can move in cycles. and if thinking about those cycles feels too big, too abstract, to really connect with — well, that's where the tarot can be incredibly useful.

which archetypes feel connected to your personal expressions and understandings of creativity? sure, there are archetypes like the magician and the empress that frequently get associated with creativity as a general concept. but if your creativity thrives in a sandbox with clear parameters and structures, the emperor might feel more relatable. if your creativity lights up when you're breaking boundaries or contemplating the ways you wand to stand out, you might consider the chariot more your style. if your creativity is activated through dream spaces or meditation or wandering through your own internal landscape without restriction, you may find deeper connections with the moon.

literally any archetype, any tarot card, can speak to creativity, in one way or another. which of these figures, these energies, feels most representative of your own creative spirit? where do you see your creativity in the cards? which card, when they emerge, immediately make you think about creative work or play?

similarly, which tarot cards capture your experience of feeling creatively depleted, burned out, unable to access those sparks of creative magic? what does it feel like for you when you're low energy, or simply can't find inspiration to create? do you feel it physically, emotionally, mentally? does something feel like it's missing? is there a dull ache within you somewhere, where the creativity usually offers a warm flame?

are there certain cards that come up regularly in your readings when your creativity is hard to find, or stagnant in some way? are there cards you associate with this sensation of creative exhaustion, frustration, or disinterest?

maybe personal creativity feels like lifeblood: something that keeps you motivated and moving, eager and curious. but maybe, creativity feels like a muse who appears, offering a sudden flash of inspiration that must be pursued. creativity can take so many forms, can feel so many ways — and so can its absence. which tarot cards represent these parts of your personal creative cycle?

for me, creativity is a steady flame, a hearth that i tend with reading, playing, discovery, research, spirituality, movement, and reflection. my trouble is rarely in having enough ideas or inspiration — indeed, i have novels that i may never complete outlined in detail, dozens of planned courses that i can't wait to finish someday, at least four more tarot books i hope to write, along with so many other projects: containers, classes, lectures, support systems, collaborations, and more.

i don't say this to brag. i say this because my particular challenge is that i'm chronically ill and self-employed, and there aren't enough hours in the day, which means that not only is my body perpetually sick and exhausted, but that there are so many parts of running a business to juggle so that i can pay my bills and buy food (and, you know, get married.)

creativity for me, once i learned to understand it, has never been the problem — but creation itself can be a roadblock. personally, i have to be deeply mindful about which projects i can tackle, and which ones must be shelved. i have to be incredibly honest about how many things i can take responsibility for, and where i'd drop balls if i tried to do it all at once. and i have to be annoyingly aware of my own physical limitations, even when that means i feel like i'm letting people down by not posting a new podcast episode or taking awhile to respond to emails.

my creativity itself is the magician, an eager, borderline obnoxious tour de force of never-ending ideas. it's fed by the priestess and death, archetypes of reflection and transformation, release and observation, inevitable endings and intentional beginnings. but my body is the hanged one, constantly begging me to slow down — or stopping me dead in my tracks after days of very little sleep, forcing me to rest whether i want to or not.

mine is an ongoing cycle, an endless turning, something that is sometimes within my control and other times, completely out of my power.

in other words, i really do think about my own creative cycle as the wheel of fortune, with clear peaks and depths. what goes up must come down, and there will always be greater forces at work that impact how my own creativity manifests. the heart may be willing, but sometimes the body really is weak and needs a day off.

on the good days, when i can translate my creativity into creation, it feels like i'm at the top of the world: inspiration is in a state of non-stop flow, my fingers can't type fast enough, i'm moving at the speed of magic. but on bad days, when the creativity is simmering but i simply don't have the energy to translate it into something real, it can feel like i've crashed down to earth: icarus' melting wings, no longer able to support my endless flights of fancy.

your relationship with creativity, your own personal creative cycles, may feel wildly different than mine. which makes sense! it's also important to remember that everyone has different circumstances that impact that creativity: i don't have children or an office job, for example, so my creative energy can largely go into my work. i share an office with my partner and live in an apartment in a noisy city, so sometimes the privacy or quiet that i crave simply isn't available. some brains are built for relentless focus, and others need constant stimulation to make things happen. some people create quickly and bounce between projects, and others like to take their time with one area of focus.

none of this is good, or bad, or weird, or silly, or right, or wrong — it simply is. but naming these personal realities, acknowledging what they are and how they impact you without judgement, is part of the process in learning to work with your own creative cycles.

don't believe me? grab your tarot deck and let's pull some cards about it.

shuffle the cards well, then when you're ready, pull four cards, one for each position:

card one / your creativity at its highest point. how does your creativity look, feel, behave, express itself, when it's flowing freely and easy to access?
card two / your creativity at its lowest point. what does it look like, feel like, when your creativity feels stagnant or difficult to access?
card three / the thing that turns the wheel. what fuels your creativity, and keeps it moving?
card four / the thing that supports the wheel. what grounds your creativity, and keeps it stable?

look at all four cards together, and observe what they have in common, and where they might have friction or tension. what is the tarot showing you about your own creativity? what can you learn from these cards about your creative cycles, the things that support and fuel your creative expression?

and what might it look like to let creativity take up more space in your life, whatever that might mean for you?

your creativity, and your creative cycles, are your own. but if you're hungry for ongoing creative relationship, for consistently creative living, for nourishing creative structure, for celebrating the ways that your creative and spiritual selves support one another, consider being part of the grove, beginning in january 2025. sign up now to take advantage of early bird pricing before it ends at midnight on december 31st:

if you're interested in connecting with specific archetypes for reflection and guidance in 2025, if you love the idea of finding your creative muse within the tarot itself, don't forget that my next journaling series find your lantern begins in just a few days.

and finally, don't forget that my signature tarot membership program, the 3am.tarot conservatory, will be increasing in price for new members only in 2025. if you've been thinking about joining, sign up now to lock in the 2024 pricing.

wishing you and yours a safe and healthy new year.